How hard is his head?No really.... How hard is it?
by Aishi-Cc
Summary: Have ever wondered just how hard Goku's head really is, or maybe Heero's? Well today thanks to labs at Clanclan Productions we will have a chance to find out!.
1. Heero

How hard is his head? No really. How hard is it? Part one: The Head of Heero Aishi-Cc  
  
Have ever wondered just how hard Goku's head really is, or maybe Heero's? Well today thanks to labs at Clanclan Productions we will have a chance to test it. We were very lucky to get the universally renowned Chibi Washu to test them for us. Washu walks up. "Hi there!" She said cheerfully. "Aisha I'm almost done so give me five ok?" "Sure thing Chibi Washu." Aisha smiles. "As you all know Clanclan Productions is dedicated to bringing you the best in insanity. Witch is the main reason why "The Why? Files" were invented. By myself and my team of voices." Aisha winks. "You should hear what they say about some people. Any way I hope you enjoy the latest product from Clanclan Productions. Please leave all thoughts in the review section we wouldn't want then to lost now would we?" Aisha shook her head. "No we wouldn't please contact use if you would like to see an idea processed. Ok now to room 01."  
  
The door opens to revel Heero tied to a chair. Washu smiled. "You can your gun back when I'm done and not before." Heero pouted. "Heero many people have wondered just how hard you head really is." I inform him as I close the door. "So?" Heero asked not at all impressed that people other then Relena are course about him. "So I got called it to test it." Washu said from behind him. She held up a nice size textbook. With a WACK she brought it down oh Heero's head. The book split in half. Washu threw the halves into a pile and pick up and even larger dictionary. WACK. It split to. "Not bad." Washu admitted. Heero rolled his eyes. WACK a telephone. WACK a laptop. WACK a Mr. Coffee. WACK a piece of Neo Titanium nonGunadm Mobile suits WACK a piece of Gundamin, pure. WACK a piece of Gundamin alloy Gundams Washu blinked at the mangled piece of metal. "Damn." Washu mumbled frowning. "Aishi will you hand me that box?" I shrug as I pick it up. It hardly weights a thing. "This will do it for sure!" Washu exclaimed as she ripped open the box. She pulled out a simple frying pan. Heero sighed. "Will we be done soon?" Washu grinned as she brought down the frying pan. WACK! Heero groaned as he slumped forward. "HahahahahaahaahahaWahahahahaha.." Washu laughed as a robot carried Heero to the Med Lab. She smiled at me."Whose next kitty?" I look at my clipboard. "Why it's.."  
  
Keke the end of part one. I'm not telling who part two is about yet. This was going to go in "The Why? Files" but I decided it would be better to make it separate. If you like this then please check out "The Why? Files" and "It's going to be one of those days" And maybe even "The COLOR WARS." Keke. Bye-ee. Ten reviews until part two is posted unless asked very nicely. 


	2. The Goku

How hard is his head? No really. How hard is it? Part two: The Goku Aishi-Cc  
  
  
  
She smiled at me. "Whose next kitty?" I look at my clipboard. "Why it's Goku!? How in the Hell did we get him?" Washu shrugged. "You book, I smash ..I mean test." I shrugged. ~How we got him is not is important.~ Washu set the frying pan down as we headed out the door. It didn't take long to get to room 02. We both blinked at what we saw. Goku was sitting on the chair stuffing his face thanks to the robots tireless efforts. " Hmy Ammshi! Tmis is great!!" Goku manages before swallowing. "I'm glad you like it Go-chan. Mako-chan, and Samy-chan will very happy." "You mmnt sommme?" I grab the tray of cookies from him. "Go-chan is it ok if with beat you in the head with stuff?" I ask sweetly. Goku blinked a few times then swallowed. "Do have to stop eating?" "No." "Then go for it Aishi." He said before stuffing his face again.  
  
Washu shook her head. "He's as bad as Ryoko." She muttered as she walked over to the pile of junk. "Hummm?" She mumbled as she surveyed the pile. "So what is he Aishi?" "He is a Saiyan-jin, full blood. Biggest thing up to date smashed with head was a mountain. Sadly he did this when he was not 100% and so hurt himself. Poor thing." "Mountain Hun?" She pulled out a com-link. "Ryoko can you bring me the box marked ouch?" "Sure." "Ouch?" I asked blinking. "They're for the harder heads of aliens. After all planets don't fit in the palm of your hands. Keke." Minutes latter Ryoko walked in carrying a shoebox sized box.  
  
Ok let me take a second to tell you about Ryoko's new look and job. Ryoko's blue hair is now dyed to resemble flames. All employees get a free make over. Keke. Anyway she works in our Testing Labs. She gets paid to break stuff. Her ideal job don't you think? Any way back to the story.  
  
"So where do you want this?" Washu waved her hand at the empty end of the table. Ryoko set the box down with a sigh. "Hey Aisha" "Hey. I love the hair." "Really? Thanks. Say Aishi?" Ryoko pulled me to the side. "Have you considered bringing Tenchi in?" Ryoko asked excitedly. "Well Ro-chan I'll be honest with you." I tell her, while putting my arm around her shoulder. "Clanclan Productions technically dose not allow employees to date." "Wha.wha!?" "But for you I'll reconsider it." I said with a wink. Ryoko grinned insanely. " Ryoko go back to work. Aishi Sit down and eat those cookies." "Yes Ma'am" Aisha sat down and Ryoko ran out. "Good. Now Goku tell me if any of this hurts ok?" "Mhmmum" Washu nodded as she rummaged threw the box. She pulled out a dark blue hammer like thing. "Ok now let us see how this works." She pushed the three buttons and slammed it on Goku's head. SLAM! She pull the hammer away. It remained whole for a few seconds before it shattered. Washu blinked at it. "Well now?" She muttered as she threw the hammer. "Well Aishi a mountain doesn't hurt him now." "Keke I didn't think it would." I answered before going back to nibbling on the cookies. "Now let me see.?" Washu pulled out a yellow hammer like thing. She pressed the three buttons and swung. SLAM! The yellow hammer like thing also shattered after a few seconds. "So much for Texas" Washu said with a shrug. She pulled out a green hammer like thingy. She pushed the buttons and smacked Goku again. SLAM! Again it shattered. "Ok.So much for the moon." "Merowl?" "Keke. Just go back to eating the cookies Aishi." Washu giggled as she picked up a green hammer like thingy. "Ok this is the most powerful one I've got. Getting hit with this is like getting hit with a Planet the size if Jupiter but with 500x the mass." "Owwiiieeee!" "Yes, Very owie." Washu agreed as she raised the hammer. SLAM! Goku lifted his head as the hammer thing shattered.  
  
"Owie!" Goku wined as he rubbed his head. "Damn!" Washu muttered. I handed her a frying pan. "Here you go Wa-chan." Washu toke the frying pan happily. "Why thank you Aishi-chan." She raised the pan. With an insane grin she brought it down on Goku's head. With a satisfying WHACK! The pan connected with his skull. He pitched forward into a bowl of chips. "Ah Ha! That's two for two!" Washu cheered. "So who's next?" "I don't know. Let's go see what's behind door number three."  
  
Ok so whom would you like to see next? Anyone special? 


	3. The She Male for Emcronian

How hard is his head? No really. How hard is it? Part two: The She Male Aishi-Cc  
  
  
  
"So who's next?" "I don't know. Let's go see what's behind door number three."  
  
The two of them walked down the hall until the found a door with a big 3 painted on it. "I think it's safe to say we found it." Washu joked as she opened the large door. A young man was sitting on the stool talking to a young woman. They both looked up as the door closed. "Akane is that you?" I asked stunned. "Yeah I cut my hair." "Wait you know the Neko?" The boy asked. "Aisha Clanclan, Chibi Washu meet Ranma Saotome your next victim." "What?" Ranma screamed jumping to his feet. "What don't you want to show off?" Akane teased. Ranma sighed. "Fine. As long as I can fight later." Washu smiled. "Clanclan Productions has one of the largest gym complexes in the world boy. You can fight all you want." Ranma nodded. "Good Ryoga going to get it." Washu picked threw the pile of junk. She pulled out a kettle. "Hum?" She walked up behind him. SMACK! Ranma rubbed his head. "Hey?" Washu threw the kettle away.  
  
"So this is what you're up to now?" Akane asked. "Yep. Say you aren't worried we'll hurt you little friend are you?" "No more then I would. He's used to getting bashed." SMACK! "So much for that." Washu muttered as she threw a sign away. "So how have you been Akane?" SMACK! "Stupid wall!" Akane blinked. "Well not too bad. It seems the training hall has become very popular lately." SMACK! "Cheap sword!" "Do tell." "Well now we have Ranma and Ryoga living there. At lest I think Ryoga lives there. He just seems to pop up." "Is he cute?" "Well ..yeah." Ranma jumped up. "RYOGA IS WHAT?" Washu bashed him in the head with a bottle of Dr. Pepper. Shattering it. "You sit." The Female Ranma glared. "Look what you did." Washu stared. " You're a she male. How interesting." "A what? No it's a curse." Washu smacked him with a mallet. "Shush."  
  
"So he turns into a girl? Must be fun in bed?" "AISHA!? I can't believe you just said that!" "Why *giggle* you just go so ballistic it's so much fun." Akane sighed. "You're right." SMACK! A dented bowling ball went flying. "How long is she going to keep that up?" "Oh until she gets board. Witch might not be too long now. She really liked that bowling ball." "Oh Why?" "It was pink of course." SMACK! "Stupid Sledge Hammer!" "I think Chibi Washu is losing it." Akane whispered. "Oh how can you tell?" Akane frowned. "Who many of these have you done today?" "Merowl.this is the third one. Maybe we should take a coffee break?" Are you sure it's ok to just leave Ranma here?" SMACK! "DAMN TANK!!!!" Sure. Washu we'll be in the coffee room. Come say hi when you're done here." "Akane don't leave meeeeee..!!!" Ranma begged as she lunged for the door. Washu grabbed her pigtail. 'And where are you going? I'm not done with you." "AKANEEEEEEEEEeeeeeeee...." Ranma screamed as the door closed. Washu held up the frying pan. "Come mere you little bone head." She called as she swung the pan around. Ranma jumped. "No way. Shit on'na you're worst then Ryoga." Washu swung again. " Hold sill." With one good wack. SMACK! CRASH!! THUD!!!! A sad looking Ranma was flung threw the door and half way into the hallway's wall. Washu sighed as she headed for the coffee room.  
  
"So that's where He-chan went? How did you ever get him?" Trowa asked. "Simple. You scream Relena and the poor thing freezes in fear. I feel really bad for him." Akane smiled. "Say Tro do you know where Wuey is?" "No. Why?" "Oh I just think him and Akane would hit it off if you know what I mean?" Trowa smiled. "I'm sure he's around hear some where. Um Aishi your pink haired friend seems to be done." "Washu you look terrible. Here have some coffee." "Why thank you Akane." She sipped her coffee. "Aishi dear I'm afraid I broke the door and put a hole in the wall." Is that all? No worries. I was thinking after lunch we should move to room number four." "Oh, and who's in there?" "Um. my memo says Inu Yasha. Inu?" I pulled out a cell phone. "Since when do we let dogs in here?" Mihoshi giggled. "Since they became experiments.wait is that right? Oh. yes it is. Inu Yasha is in room number four with his master Kagome." "Oh well as long as he's an experiment." "Well Ryoko said he was hot. But I don't know. Oh dear where did my coffee go?" A cup of coffee runs across the floor. "Right.Well thanks." "So Chinese?" "Yeah!" The four of them walked off. "Did any one else see a running cup of java?" Trowa asked. "Yeah? What's up with that?" Akane asked. "Oh nothing really." Washu assured them. "Right." I muttered.  
  
"Akane? It hurts." Jupiter tugged on her feet. "She's in here good. Mars bring the chainsaw." "It's hurts." 


	4. Sit Boy for ember fang & kitty d...

How hard is his head? No really. How hard is it? Part Four: Sit Boy Aishi-Cc  
  
Kagome looked up as the door opened. Inu Yasha blinked at Aisha when she sauntered in. ~Nice figure...for a neko.~ Aisha blinked. ~He is kindda cute.~ Kagome smiled at Washu and Aisha. "It's a pleasure to meet you." She said with a bow. The others bowed back. "So what are you damn on'na going to do to me?" Washu walked to the pile of junk behind him. "Well Inu Yasha Chibi Washu is going to beat you in the head with things till you pass out." Aisha answered cheerfully. Inu Yasha shared a look with Kagome. "So what is this for again?" Kagome asked. "Why research of course. We here at Clanclan Productions are always look for new ways to control..I mean help those who constantly get themselves in trouble." Washu answered. Kagome smiled. "Well Inu Yasha dose get in a lot of trouble." Inu Yasha growled. "Well I wouldn't if some bitch hadn't shoot up the fucking jewel. You baka on'na should of just given it to me to begin with." Kagome glared at the mutt hands on hips. "Oh yeah?" "Yeah." "Then how would you have gotten Tetsusaiga? Besides you'd be worst then Sessho-maru. I don't think so." Inu Yasha growled. "Bitch. Leave my brother out of this."  
  
Aisha giggled. "As much fun as this is we must get started." She checked her chipboard. "We still have a lot of these to do today. Any time Chibi Washu." Washu walked over to yet another pile of junk. She rummaged around. "Well I'm so outta here." Inu Yasha stated as he stood. "Oh now you don't" Aisha warns. Kagome shook her head. "You'll love this." She whispered. She motioned for Inu Yasha to come back as she evilly called "Sit Boy!" Inu Yasha slammed into the floor face first. He jumped to his feet before whirling around to glare at the to giggling on'na. "BITCH!" Washu stepped up behind him unnoticed. WAHM! She whacked Inu Yasha in the side of the head with a long bow hard enough to knock him over. "You're as bad a Ryoko. Always leaves herself open when she gets all mad." Inu Yasha growled. "You pink haired psycho bitch." Washu raised a katana. WAHM! Inu Yasha landed in his chair. "Bad dog." "Wolf. I'm a wolf you freaky bitch." "Whatever."  
  
WAHM! A roof. WAHM! A horse. WAHM! A boulder. WAHM! A pole. WAHM! A cart. Kagome frowned. "Aisha won't this hurt him eventually?" "Most likely. Don't worry. We have the galaxy's best healers in our med wings. He'll be as good as new when we're done with him." WAHM! "Ow!" ""If you say so."  
  
"I think those straps need to be tighter." Mercury said as she cheeked on Heero's recovery. Jupiter shrugged and pulled them. "OOOOOOOOooooooW!" Heero yelped as his eyes bulged. "Perfect." Mars frowned at Female Ranma and Akane." Ma'am you're in our way." She informed Akane foot tapping. "Gomen. May I have a pot of boiling water?" "Sure thing." Venus called as she ran off. Dende frowned. "Couldn't the others and me just heal them?" Ami looked at him. "You mean I can't play doctor any more?" She started to cry. "No please go right ahead." Ami jumped up and down. "Yeah yeah yipeeeeee..!" "Here's the water!" Akane toke it and poured it on Ranma. Minko eyes went wide as he changed back. "KAWIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiii.!" She squealed while jumping up and down like a well blonde baka. "Hun?" Rei asked sweat dropping. "Man..man.man.." Minko chanted drooling. Makoto and Ami ran over. Ami's clip board whacking Heero in the head. "Hey?" "KAWIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii...!" The three scouts squalled before swinging each other around. Rei flopped over as Moon walked in. "What's going on?" Rei stood back up. "Cute guy." She answered. Usagi eyes grew widened. "MAN..Man.man.man...!" She squealed as she ran to join the other girls. Rei once again fell over.  
  
Washu nodded in approval of the mess she had made. "Are we almost done? Some people have shards to collect." Kagome stuck her tongue out at him. Washu lifted the frying pan. "Oh here we go again." Aisha muttered. Kagome blinked at her then turned away as the frying pan connected with the half daemon's think skull. WAHM! Inu Yasha pitched forward. "Oh Inu Yasha?" Kagome called out suddenly afraid for the boy. "Aisha flicked open her cell phone. "man.man." "Moshi moshi?" "Hiya Mars we need clean up room 4." "Is it another guy? Because so far I've had to listen to Kawii squealed and Man chanted three times already." "Merowl.well.." "Also that red head form the wall is a boy." "Yes We knew that the whole time." "Just send Mako-chan up here ok?" "Yes ma'am." With a click the scout was gone. "Maybe we should try a girl next. It's turning in to a guy fest down there." Washu shrugged. "Fine. Who's next?" ""ummm."  
  
"Jupiter room four now." The other scouts were slowly wining down. In about five minutes they would be fine until the next cute guy was brought in. "Kay!" Makoto called as she ran off. Ami sighed. "Time to play doctor again." Mars shivered. ~Oh Kami.~  
  
Tell me who'd you like to see next kay? Luv ya and Gomen it toke me so long to post it.. I've stared two new accounts. Demonic Goku and Lita 4. Enjoy 'em and please tell your friends about me. Thanx. =^-_-^= Oh yeah. Please remember I mean no disrespect to these people. This is not to be taken seriously. Take it a face value laughs please. I don't want anyone coming after me 'coz they thought I was bashing their fave. Anime charters. If it dose not warn of bashing then do not take it as bashing. Well I feel better now. How about you? I hope you enjoyed this story and will read some more of my stuff. I know I loved writing it. I love my job! 


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